Right you've all heard about recent events in my state, so, stream of consciousness:
(Warning: Some of these are tongue-in-cheek satire, which is my way of expressing my rage over what happened.)
1. Quick, someone register www.bloomerg2010.com and sell it to future Governor Mike's campaign.
2. Maybe if Hillary cares about her "home state" so much, she should run for Albany once she loses the nomination/general election. Let the hometown rags have all their fun about the first husband and wife team to be governors of two separate states.
3. Maybe if Hillary is elected president, Bill will get bored and run for New York governor. He'll just want Eliot to leave his little black book behind.
4. Yes, Spitzer will resign soon. He's just waiting for the state constitution to be translated into Braille. (Lieutenant Governor Paterson is blind.)
5. In the same year that we might have our first black president, New York will surely have its first governor (Lieutenant Governor Paterson is also African-American.)
6. Governor Paterson just has a more gubernatorial ring to it than Spitzer. It sounds comfortable and trustworthy, just like upstate New York.
7. I knew I should've voted for John Faso.
8. Great, how are women expected to trust men now? VALENTINE'S DAY EVE?!
9. Ah, yes, No. 9. As in Client No. 9.
10. Someone let me know when the pre-sale is to buy front-row seats to the People of the State of New York vs. Eliot Spitzer.
11. And I thought November 4th would be the best political day of this year. This might beat it by far.
12. I called it yesterday (and would have done it myself if I had a radio show): Don Imus played the "Number 9" voice from The Beatles' "Revolution No. 9" as he went to break.
13. I leave for Spring Break to Cozumel, Mexico on Wednesday morning. When I come back next week, I'll be sure to say something corny like, "Geez, I go away for a week and you change the governor?"
14. In all seriousness though, I don't think I could possibly feel worse for his wife and daughters. No one deserves this, no matter how much of a self-righteous tool your husband/father is.
2 comments:
1. What are the other 290,022 reasons NY isn't as dysfunctional as New Jersey? Also, I don't think is a valid reason. At least New Jersey's governor cheated on his wife with someone he was in a romantic relationship with. Spitzer cheated on his wife with a hooker he'd never met and had no idea what she looked like until he booked her. And while gay marriage isn't quite legal in NJ (yet), gay dating is okay...meanwhile, patronizing prostitutes is illegal in all 50 states.
2. Paterson is legally blind...not blind. There's a difference, and while I'm not entirely sure of his exact vision and abilities it entails, the newshound in me must insist you get your facts straight before you tick off some disabled rights group.
3. The real reason Spitzer is waiting to resign? He's bounced back from Troopergate and the Immigration scandal and is trying to decide if he can be as teflon when it comes to this one..(he can't)
4. They don't sell tickets on pre-sale to court cases, but they do give out press passes....
Sorry Mike, couldn't resist :)
Mike,
Have you have checked out Imus Times want to add us to your blog roll?
http://imustimes.wordpress.com/2008/03/08/matt-taibbi-when-doves-cry/
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