Sunday, June 1, 2008

Ronald Reagan? The actor? Then who's VICE-President, Jerry Lewis?

Not often (actually, this is probably the first time) do I say the phrase: Tragic news out of Hollywood today. However, a blaze at Universal Studios took from our society the set of the Hill Valley Clock Tower from Back to the Future. Now Marty McFly will never get back to 1985. That space-time continuum is such a darned stickler for the rules.

Viva Hillary in Puerto Rico today. Yet the Obamamaniacs are salivating for Tuesday night and/or Wednesday morning when the scarily untested Barack Obama is expected to reach the new magic number of 2118. My boy Big Fat Timmy Russert actually proclaimed: "This is so over!" Patience, Timmy, patience. Wait another month and I bet we'll learn that guest preacher Rev. Billy Sol Hargis declared Senator Clinton as Satan in an appearance at Trinity United Church, during which Senator Obama nodded in relieved agreement.

I remarked to my friend Angelina at lunch the other day that if the Democratic National Committee were a publicly traded company, shareholders would be calling for the board's heads. Yes, Senator Obama received the most delegates and is inspirational and transformative and sexy, but you are going to have a lot of angry little Appalachians on your hands soon, Howard Dean. The Republican Party has made it their business now two terms in a row to get a generally unsavory guy to propel themselves to victory. Why? Because they know it's their mission to win. Is that the mission of the Democrats? Doubtful at this point. Barack is getting killed in polls in Ohio and Florida, and those 47 swing electoral votes cannot be lost if you really want one of your own in the White House this January. Polls show Senator Obama getting whooped by Senator McCain in those states.

My bottom line advice to the DNC: If you want to nominate Obama, fine. But pull him aside and say, "Pick Hillary as your running mate, or we're nominating her instead." It's the party's only hope.

Also, if Senator McCain takes Mitt Romney as his running mate, I'm requesting a write-in ballot and voting Clinton.

Right, back to writing grad school papers.

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